Paying Respect to the Drunken Elves
by january sunshine
Summary: St. Patrick's Day Fic! Mello's got no spirit. Near seems to be absolutely glowing green, and Matt's on his side. How's Mello going to deal? Another Holiday oneshot, hope you guys enjoy! And L makes a pudding cameo.


Because I love you all oh so very much (and I should take a break from my Kingdom Hearts fic which I intend to completely finish), I've decided to write you all this happy little fic, for St. Patrick's day!

Which just happens to be today... Go figure! -yawns- It's 11:25. I've been up for 24 minutes and mentaru hasn't answered my IM, so...

**Paying Respect to the Drunken Elves**

**by Darkness Princess**

**:x:**

There were certain things Mello never worried about: colors, his hair, food, and shoes. He always wore black, usually with jeans, and nobody forced him in anything else except on special occasions. His hair was always in the same manner. His food consisted of chocolate--of course, they forced him to eat other things, but it was all primarily chocolate. His shoes... what shoes?

It was his system and he liked it that way. Clad in simple black clothing, eating a chocolate bar, with his feet bare and toes feeling warm in the sunlight as he sat under a tree outside. From here, he could see half the others in the orphanage: a group of kids were playing soccer, and they knew he was an unfair advantage and so kindly told him to get the hell off of the field, and Matt was sucking on a lolipop with his GameBoy in hand, a foot pushing Near's head. Near swatted at him simply, the hem of white pajamas seen--wait a minute.

This was mainly normal. Matt usually bothered Near because Mello told him to, but... Near always wore his white pajamas. Off-white, fading white, grey-from-overwear-white... those were not white! The windows were at a slight glare from the sunlight, but he couldn't declare if those were blue or green.

But why weren't they _white_?

He sat up from the tree, taking another bite of the chocolate, and crossed his arms impatiently, waiting for Matt to hurry outside. They were going to hang out--as always, even though they rarely did any actual activity together besides sitting--and so Mello had declared that Matt would join him outside.

He was a very impatient seven-year-old.

Matt spent another minute inside, falling to sit for a moment, and soon he was seen laughing as Near reached over. He couldn't be hanging out with that precocious five-year-old, Mello wouldn't allow it. So, standing up, he stormed back indoors, an attempt to kick them open failed when he merely hurt the bottom of his foot.

He shoved them over and promptly stormed into the living room. Near was, indeed, in emerald green pajamas, still working on a puzzle; oddly, the bold color made him look less pale. He decided not to focus on him, and turned to his friend. "Matt!" he called angrily, glaring.

Matt grinned and held up a hand. Scribbled green with Near's uncommonly neat coloring skills. He was two years younger than Mello and he could stay in the lines--plus, he knew the alphabet forwards, backwards, in French, English, and Russian, and that all just bothered Mello. He'd get it backwards soon...

"Matt... why is your hand green?" he asked.

"Spin around, Mello!" Matt said quickly in response.

"What does my spinning around have to do with your hand?" Mello wondered, getting rather annoyed as Matt didn't answer his question.

"Just spin around, okay? One spin."

He huffed, but nonetheless dropped his arms and made a slow three-sixty in front of the redhead. Matt seemed satisfied with his answer and grinned brightly, roughly pinching Mello's arm.

"Ow! What the hell?!" Mello said, lifting an arm to smack him in response.

"St. Patrick's day!" Matt replied. He jumped back to avoid Mello's arm, and the blond glared, not quite connecting what that had to do with anything. Matt grabbed his hand and tugged him over. "It's a rumor from Ireland, or something, where the drunken elves won't kill you in your sleep if you wear green for the day."

Near looked up. "It has to do with the shamrocks, Matt," he said softly.

"Who cares?!" Mello interrupted them before an argument could spark. He threw his arms in the air, and ran them through his hair once before letting them drop to his side. "I don't care at all, and you're both stupid." With that, he walked out of the living room.

Linda, in a perky green dress with shamrocks embroidered on the hem, bounced over, handed him a shamrock, and pinched him in the arm. Geoffrey, wearing a green shirt that said "Kiss me, I'm Irish", walked over, kissed Mello's cheek (because he was determined to say Mello was a girl), and pinched his side. Sphinx approached, green hair clips in an uncanny amount on her short locks, and merely pinched Mello's hand.

He glared after each of them and took no chances by running into his room. He was going to hurt anyone else who pinched him. After half an hour of studying--since it passed the time, and he could beat Near this way--Matt had wandered into his room. "Look, Roger's coloring the milk green!" he said with a grin, holding up the cup. "Try it, it tastes relatively normal!"

Mello glared. "Go away."

Matt pinched him. "You're gonna get pinched each time someone sees you if you don't wear anything green." He tugged on his shirt. "See?" He wore a green shirt over his black shirt now, and seemed proud to display its direct contrast with his hair. Mello shoved him out of the room, and slammed the door. "This is absolutely ridiculous!" he murmured.

He was pinched by seven other kids before lunch, by two during the actual meal, and pinched by all nine again while trying to leave. Now he was certain he'd bruise, but this was stupid. "Next person who punches me gets decked in the face!" he murmured angrily.

He dropped onto his bed that afternoon and decided he'd ignore everyone by sleeping. Mello didn't like naps, especially when they were forced, but when he was frustrated enough, he found it as a suitable distraction technique--if beating up on Near wasn't enough. He had only been asleep for around half an hour before Matt came in shaking him awake.

"They said L's going to come visit today!" he said happily.

It wasn't even a real holiday, but who knew. Maybe L was just at a low when it came to cases. He spent quite a bit of time visiting, and that was always nice. It always made Mello very excited, and the boy was so anxious he jumped up and ran out of the room. Two steps away, and he ran back to the doorway. "You coming, Matt?"

Matt only snickered and hurried after him.

Mello didn't get his laughter, and by the time he reached the living room downstairs, he was still being snickered at. Just what... was going on? They laughed behind him, or snickered, and once, Linda walked over and asked him if he fixed it voluntarily.

"Fixed what?" he asked.

"Guess not." And she bounced away.

Mello spun around quickly and looked at Matt. "I demand to know why everyone's laughing at me!"

Matt snickered behind his hand and pointed to the bathroom. "I don't know how Near got the stuff... but the kid works fast. Wait til April Fools!"

That meant pranks. Mello was pranked, by a five-year-old in green pajamas, and he didn't even know how. He hurried to the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. That was when he gasped, and soon began screaming. Loud, uncontrollable screams, echoing against the walls and through the hallway.

His hair... his lovely golden locks... in the same style he always wore were... Emerald Green.

He was still screaming when Roger came in to figure out what happened, tears streaming down his cheeks as he looked at his reflection. They were telling him stuff, but he refused to stop screaming, still pointing at his reflection. Green... he was... his hair... so green!

Roger ended up carrying him out, and Mello was screaming into his shoulder about his hair. He silenced at one calm sentence: "You'll get no more chocolate today if you continue screaming."

He resorted to silent sobs, glaring through reddened eyes at Matt, who was still laughing, and Near, who almost felt bad that he had done such a thing. All in the spirit of St. Patrick's day...

"Oh, and who's this with the bright green hair?" a calm voice asked.

Roger pat his back gently. "It would be Mello. Near found the temporary spray coloring and decided somebody needed some Irish cheer," the man replied, then turned to him. "Mello, say hello..."

Mello turned his head slowly, and found himself gaping at L. He looked somewhat ridiculous, bright green hair approaching reddened eyes and a flushed, tearstained face, nose on the verge of dripping, his mouth opened wide as he stared at the Great Detective in front of him. "You... i... uh..." He meeped and began wiping his face quietly, blinking before he turned to look at L again, in the hopes of seeming more presentable.

"You've been crying," L commented calmly.

Mello nodded dumbly. A sound of glass breaking caused Roger to sigh, and he set Mello down, quickly excusing himself to find out what broke. Mello stared upwards at L, before quickly latching himself to the older one's leg.

"Mello? Care to let go?"

Mello shook his head for a moment, then glanced up. "Where's your green, L?"

L's smile became a tad sheepish and he turned his head, to display an odd patch of sprayed green. Mello had to grin. "Did Near do that?" he asked. L nodded and smiled, stretching a hand down.

"Near just wants everyone in on the festivities, it seems. Isn't that right, Near?"

The small one nodded sheepishly and walked over, clinging to L's other hand. Matt looked at them, then went back to playing on his video game.

"You guys should try the green pudding," he said calmly.

Mello and L both stared to look at him. "Is it chocolate pudding?" Mello asked.

"Tapioca?"

"It's green!" Near replied with a grin, tugging on L. "Come on, it's yummy!"

Mello followed happily, grabbing onto L's other hand to allow the man usage of his legs. Matt kept a slight distance as he led the way, fingers moving quickly on his game system. They soon made it to the kitchen and L helped them dish out the pudding. Definitely green. He seemed a tad curious to know how they managed this, and Near explained how he had helped empty two cans of food coloring into the pudding to make it such a color. Mello spent half the pudding glaring at him, and the other half staring at L in pure admiration.

But he was planning, secretly plotting... Near must pay.

L was called away later that evening, and Mello clung until Matt pried him off. He watched by the window as Watari drove away, L perched in the passenger seat, waving out of the window as they left.

"Now what?" Matt asked once he was gone. They didn't have much else to do, and as Mello combatted the Green Vanilla Pudding taste with a rich chocolate bar, he was back to playing his game in the living room. Mello was watching Near, who seemed to be nodding off over a puzzle. He had a smirk on his face, and even as Matt turned to him, he wasn't looking away.

"He turned my hair _green_... Green, which is _not_ blond at all!"

"It's yellow and blue, so it's half-green..." Matt murmured.

"Matt?"

"What?"

"Shut up."

"You're mean."

Matt hushed anyway, and returned to playing his game. By this time, Near had completely fallen asleep hugging his puzzle, and Roger came out a few minutes later to carry him to his room. Once Roger returned to tell them to get ready for bed, Mello smirked and turned to Matt.

"Are you ready?"

Matt blinked. "What? Are you... aw man, you're planning again, aren't you?"

Mello grinned and grabbed his hand.

**:x:x:**

The next morning started as most others did. Though Near woke in green pajamas instead of white, he was sure it was because he had fallen asleep in his from yesterday. His puzzle sat on his desk, toys on the floor and around his bed... but something seemed off besides just his pajamas.

His T-bot toy was scribbled green, and the marker was rubbing off on the sheets. His puzzles were covered in green. And a green box sat next to his bed. Opening it, he solved a small puzzle, green and white pieces connecting to form a white square with green words:

_**Look in a mirror**_

He quickly scrambled out of his bed, hugging his transformer, which was covered in green as well, and hurried to the bathroom down the hall. His hair... was sprayed green. His cheeks had green scribbles, funny little faces drawn, on his skin. Glancing at his hands, he noticed they had been colored green as well.

He gaped, squeaked, and soon took off running, sliding in his pajamas and slipping now and then as he stumbled his way downstairs. "Rooooooger!" he whined loudly. "Mello colored my room green!"

And upstairs, laughing softly behind a chocolate bar, while Matt slept and drooled on his leg, Mello was satisfied. Four hours of green markers and hair spray and Matt trying not to laugh, and Mello figured he had done a nice job.

"That's why you leave my hair alone," he murmured to himself, and let out a maniacal cackle.

**;owari;**

And there ya have it. I might write another one later if I'm bored, but who knows. **Happy St. Patrick's day!** Don't color anyone's hair (especially not Mello's)!

It's almost 1. This fic, ccombating my hunger and cold-warmth (I don't even understand it), took around an hour and a half... and my friend can write brilliant smut in 20 minutes! I'm... slow. -sob- Matt, I want my drunken elf!

**:Darkness Princess.**


End file.
